It’s been six months since Mister and I said “we do”.
In my previous marriages, I did not think to celebrate half year anniversaries but I’m married to a man that is good at dreaming and especially at celebrating small (but big) things.
It’s not about spending a lot of money or making a big hoorah, but it is worth taking time out for me to put my phone away, watch a movie that encourages us to cuddle on the couch and sip our favorite red wine.
While recently studying a devotional on the book of Ruth, I came across a quote about marriage being rest when you’re with the right person.
With the right partner, marriage is rest. | Rebecca Faires
Not that I’m an expert, but having been married twice before with many, many, m-a-n-y unrestful moments, this quote is true.
It doesn’t mean that marriage is not work. It does not mean that it’s super easy. In fact, I think when we’re not in it we can idolize it and morph it into all the things we want it to be when it’s oftentimes the opposite.
Our commitment was always about doing it God’s way.
For us, this includes a lot of things I wanted in a marriage – wanted to show up and do/give/be in a marriage partnership – but did not have the courage, energy or confidence to do/give/be. It was more important for me to please + perform, than be authentic + strong.
And this is hard y’all.
I am a strong person.
So strong that I’ve weathered some pretty significant storms in life – does being married twice before, raising a boy by myself, changing careers 57 times (at least how it feels) count and experiencing major medical setbacks in my early 40s – and am still faithful to God. I still believe Him. I still love Him. I still walk with Him.
All be it’s never been perfectly done – because well, have we met? – but it’s been done with a spirit of hope. Of belief that I’m truly more than what’s happened to me. Or the disappointments I’ve inflicted on others. Or the decisions that some have felt I should have made but I didn’t – even though they were right.
I own that. Or at least I’m beginning to.
Part of how I’m doing it is learning to celebrate the small things. Currently, I’m most intentional about celebrating small steps in building my business, but it’s leaking into other areas of my life…like my love connection with Mister.
He is diligent in loving me.
I tear up while typing this.
I recently spoke with a group of young women from the church we all attend – never married, no children – and my heart was honored to be able to sit with them for a few hours, even though it was well beyond the strength of my natural deodorant. Seriously, an aside – it’s hot here in Texas and when you add a some excitement and a little nervousness to an opportunity to speak, you get super self-conscious sweaty me.
We were sitting together talking on the eve of my 6 month wedding anniversary and all I wanted to call out in them was their beauty. Right now. In their singleness, in their waiting. The beauty that I am becoming more confident seeing. The beauty that my Mister and close, trusted folks who knew my heart also called out in me. It’s not just because I have a man to tell me that he finds me beautiful that I’m better receiving it, but because God saw fit – after all the dumb I’ve done + wounds I’ve sustained – to partner me, ME, with this man and allow my beauty to shine brightly.
Heck yeah, we celebrated!
Though our spicy dinner messed with my tummy, (too much info?) we had a fairly enjoyable night. It was quiet, slow, without distraction (read “no phone, work or computer) and it was wonderful.
It is how I’m learning to roll. It’s Simply Sather…
Thank you Mister! It’s been a great 6 months, I’m praying and believing for many, many more.
Wedding Venue: Stonebridge Wedding Venue
Photographer: Lily Hayes Photography
Wedding Coordinator: email me at simplysatherteam(dot)gmail(dot)com – she was fantastic!