Simply Sather

cultivating what matters | july

Wow! Really July? You gone…


And though I thought I’d taken into consideration our weeklong travel to the lovely state of Washington, I missed the mark in cultivating what matters. It wasn’t a complete loss though – I discovered some pretty big things. Which reminded me – it’s not about digging in the dirt to grow a perfect version of yourself, it’s about clearing the weeds to make room for the things that take your time, attention, energy and focus, things that matter + make you grow.

So while I hit it out of the park in some areas, I struck out at the plate in others. Here’s the July update!


  • Have a Staycation!

Wowza. With all that’s transpired this month, I’d forgotten we’d planned this (and made it happen). Rather than treat Mister’s time off from work over the holiday as a complete check-out time, we agreed to plan a few things to tour our own city. You never know how long God will call you to a place and the last time I made a major move, I promised myself I would not ever again live in a place without taking the time to be a tourist. We kept it simple and fluid, but did a little something everyday – it was a treat!

back to the spot where MIster proposed; 04 july 2018 pure land organic farm
  • Washington Travel

This 8 days of travel taught us that we need to more clearly communicate about what “vacationing” really looks like. I had to apologize to Mister for this and confess it to a few others, this is largely my fault because my husband asked me (several times) to look at and weigh in on the schedule, but I just didn’t think I needed to be in the planning details. It sounded better to say I trusted him to make all of the decisions – he knows the area (grew up in Seattle), knows my likes and preferences and wanted to have a great time too.

silly in seattle

But what was honest was I needed more down time to watch stupid TV, more time to sleep/nap, more time to be more spontaneous and unplanned and mostly more time to process what I was experiencing. It was a lot! But it was a lot of good.

We’re home and finally recovering. I’m praying we’ve learned our lesson before wheels are up to Portland in August.

  • Theta service

I did not do any of this either. Two of the folks I wanted to serve were unavailable, so it looks like August will be the time for me to get in touch with them.

  • Budget

Yep. That did not happen.

And to be fully transparent, I probably needed to hit rock bottom and see how my financial behavior has been an anchor around our relationship. We can afford fancy together, but me – I’ve got to get it together in order to compliment his efforts and follow his lead.

August is already shaping up to be a lean month for me. As I navigate truly walking through paying off my debt, I’ll share more of what it’s doing for my soul.

  • Editorial Calendar – July + August

I did lay out some intentional posts for the month of July but am still learning how to better draft out what is happening in this space and over on Instagram. Being focused and sticking with a theme helps me better navigate what I ought to and can give my best to. I have now drafted an editorial calendar for August (which I do in pencil because well great ideas don’t always come four weeks in advance) but am hoping to develop enough of a creative rhythm where I’m able to pencil in what I’m doing two months at a time.

  • Pride + Prejudice Project

Eek! This was such a big mess, Mister and I are spreading this project (and our reading) into August too. Which I think is giving me a better idea for 2019 – take a whole summer to read a classic. They are just not like picking up books written in the last 50 years; you need to let the words of the classics spread throughout.

You can review my intention over here.

  • Read 6 books

We’ll see, but I don’t think I’ll finish my 6th book (Crushin’ It! How Great Entrepeneurs Build Their Business and Influence – And How You Can, Too) by 12a on the 1st of August, but it’s not over yet.

Here are the five books I was able to complete this month.

Scroll on down to July 2018! I’m super excited to think I’ll finish my challenge – already thinking of what I’ll read over the holidays (November + December) and what next year’s challenge/theme will be.

Regina Review: The Butler
one of the 5 books I read this month
  • Finish STONES – friend’s unpublished book

My friend Jennifer Fliss is a fantastic short story writer and poet. She has published in those formats and is now writing her very first novel. She invited me to be one of four beta readers and I couldn’t have been more honored.

Not only did I enjoy the book but also thrived in the experience of playing editor and feedback giver; so excited to see this in print!

  • Prep Talk for Single Women from Church

I’ve been studying scriptures about being a godly wife (and husband) in preparation to talk with women in their 30s and 40s – not yet married, no children – about putting themselves out there to meet the man God has set aside for them.

I’ve been trying to recall what my single self needed to work through and am now realizing how much my married self mirrors her.

Two nights have been about reviewing studies, scriptures, notes and the last day before hand will be dictated to a rough outline and prayer to guide me. I want to be sure there is time to share my stumble through it all and of course God’s faithfulness, but also to give them to ask my questions.

I pray it’s a time of value and encouragement.

  • Complete Theta Foundation Application

I scratched this.

While I was prayerful about attending the Making Things Happen Conference in September, it was not making sense. I’ve received a grant for leadership development in the past and considered applying to attend this one this fall.

I was jumping through all kinds of obstacles and decided to postpone it until next year. As I get older, I’m learning that things from God don’t require a constant uphill battle. Not to say that things are easy or just fall into your lap, but when it’s set aside for you, it’s not all of the crazy to get it. So, while there is effort in applying, saving, registering and doing all the work – the headaches for forcing myself into one of their seats this fall did not seem like my personal best yes.


  • Email Mister x 2

I did well at this until we had to prepare for our trip to Washington and then it went kaput. So sorry Mister! I still love you and have it on the calendar to restart my book for you this week.

  • Date Your Spouse

I’m counting all of the fun stuff we did in Washington while on vacation as 17 dates so yep, we knocked this one out of the park!

  • Blog 3x week

I don’t think so.

And I no longer think this is a reasonable goal. I want to provide more meaningful content and be able to share it in a concise way – I know folks have many things they’re consuming online and my posts can get a little wordy. (This post is shaping up to be a great example!) So this will likely change and my goal for blog posts next month will closer to 10 or 2 per week. But some diverse topics are coming your way, so hopefully you’ll experience a quality over quantity kind of vibe.

  • A Simple Year: July

Um, no. Just no.

I did not do the work, nor did I live very simply this month.


  • Instagram with Intention (1 session/week)

Also, no.

I started this course – brilliant – by the way when I didn’t know I’d be building my business on soul care. I’d almost made it through the whole program. Now that I know what my focus is, I’ll be going back and retaking it from the beginning.

  • #Million Minutes

With this public library challenge in my city, we read so many minutes! I didn’t win one of the grand prizes, but did get two movie tickets. I would have read the 35 hours anyway, but it was sweet to win a little something for tracking and reading with my community.

Guest Pass
movie passes for two!
  • Love Others

I did, but I’ll be completely transparent here. I did not go after those who I most need to pursue. This will be changing.


  • Mister

I kept track of asking my husband specific ways that I demonstrated love in a language that he understood. I am so grateful to be married to someone who takes great pleasure in some of my smallest efforts. Sitting on the couch with my feet in his lap while watching TV, conversation over glasses of red wine, personal email, prayers before bed; I did great of tracking right up until we started to get ready to go on our vacation. Gonna try this one again – I want to master this one!


  • Hydrate 4 Ellos/day


  • M+ R Journal

Every night. I save ticket stubs and write about our emotions, the fun and even the conflict. It’s good to see our daily living in words that we can look back on and review.

  • Bible (Ruth + being a godly wife)

A-l-m-o-s-t everyday I read scriptures and devotionals about being a godly wife and the story of Ruth. It’s been a great experience – especially as a newly married person; though I’ve been married before, it’s been important for me to continually replace my experiences with real hope.

There is so much that I missed this past month but there was so much that I also gained. I am working at seeing misses + failures as opportunities and with this past month, I’m winning! Also, because I’m married to a grace-filled, merciful husband, Mister invested in my business and purchased me a new MacBook Air; not bragging – just letting you know that my fingers are flying over the keyboard (rather than my system hack – ipadMini + bluetooth keyboard – I created and was using for May + June).

How was your July? What are you intentionally focusing on in August? Please share, I’d be happy to cheer you on.

4 thoughts on “cultivating what matters | july

  1. Great read as always!! I have a question. So I’m not “putting myself out there” just yet. Can you elaborate on what that means for someone single and celibate that’s being led by God? Also, did you put yourself out there when you were single? How do you know when it’s time? Just few thoughts. 😊

    1. So grateful you continue to find the time to read along and even more grateful that you’re asking questions.

      I made a note to circle back to this and potentially write a post about it – but for now, to answer your question, I think you are best off if you start at the desired end result.

      What is it that you’re seeking? What do you hope to receive/achieve? And I don’t just mean a marriage or relationship…

      What KIND? What does life look like? What will you be able to do in partnership with that person that you’re unable to do on your own? How will you show up differently in this relationship than you have before? Why would your goal be beneficial to you, them and bring glory to God?

      Oops!!! I did that thing, didn’t I? Where I answer a question with more questions. Eeek!

      Here, let me try answering your questions…

      As for me, when I was single, I first decided who I wanted to be in the dating arena, read a book about it (I know, right?), got a team of folks around me that would both cheer me on and hold me accountable – being in your 40s and dating while also remaining pure of mind, body and spirit ain’t easy – and then I set up my profile and got into online dating!

      I didn’t really “know” it was time I just knew I was ready for companionship. And though my schedule was completely ridiculous at the time – I ALWAYS made time for it – even when it wasn’t fun or going well; I made it a priority everyday.

      I hope that helps. So glad you’re reading along!

      1. Yes this helps and I actually was answering your questions as you asked them. Lol! What I do already know is that my union with my future mate HAS to bring glory to God because if it doesn’t what’s the purpose of the union. Unfortunately, I’ve learned this late in life but better late than never. I think you’re correct in your “feeling the time is right” thought. I will know and I’m sure I’ll get a nudge as well or at least I’m hoping I will from Holy Spirit. I do miss companionship but that’s about it for the most part. Thanks for responding and your questions you asked are worth revisiting in my quiet time. I’m glad you asked them. 😊

      2. You’re very welcome! I just met with a group of single women from the church – never married, no kids; we talked about this very thing. I’m drafting a blog post to hopefully share before the end of the month.

        So glad to be of help!

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